Afraid of Inspiration

I wonder if there are out there, other people who fear inspiration. I do.

The problem is that I am, artistically, horribly ambitious. I would love to play the piano like Leif Ove Andsnes and direct an orchestra, with the connection, sensitivity and artistic vision he has. I would love to sit at the piano and learn and practice for hours on end. I would like to be a painter, a dancer, an actress, an Opera singer, a clothes designer, and do all of those things to perfection. And it is impossible, unless you don’t do anything else! All of them, full time activities.

And I must write. I must, as you must give birth to a baby you love and want.

I wish I could create and give birth to the nearly limitless art-expression-children of my mind and my heart that I would dream of having.

Perhaps I will re-incarnate into a limitless being with limitless artistic possibilities and limitless time.

But, I do like earth, and my time here… what shall I do?

Write!http://www.theguardian.com/music/tomserviceblog/2015/jul/28/beethoven-leif-ove-andsnes-concertos-mahler-chamber-orchestra#img-1

The Autumn Leaves of the Mind

Writing is pouring out of me. I feel like a tree in autumn, in need of shedding its leaves. In this case the leaves are pages and pages. I’ve always loved writing little articles about things I see or think about. I had the good fortune to have my first writing job in 2007, thanks to the good efforts of Joan Ilott who connected me with the, then, up and running, Banbury Magazine. Sadly, it suffered the same fate of so many adventures of the mind and the spirit when they require money to move forwards. In other words, it is not any more amongst us. I started as a contributor with no payment. After a couple of years I was Editor of one of the last editions and won my first, and so far only, £500 for my literary efforts.

Let’s see what happens when I receive my first installment for the Amazon sales of The Thermodynamics of Love Trilogy Volume 1, The Secret Life of a God. I doubt it has made me rich yet! But since I am an optimist, who knows….

Anyway, I wrote some 20 articles on different topics for the Banbury Magazine and I loved it. After all, anyone who knows me, also knows that I am VERY OPINIONATED! So, now I am pouring my opinions and reflections through blogs, and of course, books. But the books take me a long long time! I am a compulsive editor, particularly since I still struggle with English prepositions. I’ll write a list of my blogs so far, once I have tidied them out. Incidentally thank you to all the people who have been following How to Grow Old the Right Way UP, The Science of the Improbable and my other activities. Here for you, Foreign Wonderer

Dark and mysterious. Alone. An outsider in contemplation