Tag Archive: Destiny


  1. Growing Old is Obligatory; Growing Up is Optional.*

Sunday 5th April 2015

Berta-The Barber of Seville 1984

This morning I woke up old and I realized, my obligation had to be fulfilled like everyone else’s.

The image I saw in the mirror brought to mind the photo you see: my 30-year-old self, singing the role of Bertha, a mid-60s maid, from Rossini’s Opera, The Barber of Seville.

At the time, I was quite convinced I would never reach such a ripe age. I dreaded both, reaching it and not.

Today, as I scanned the prune-like face in the mirror, I felt, as I often do, so happy and triumphant that I have made it this far!

I dare say I have also kept growing up.

I have grown in wisdom, therefore, in self-acceptance and self-love.

Death doesn’t frighten me as it used to. Neither wrinkles do.

Berta’s aria finishes with the lines:

“E vecchietta disperata

mi convien così crepar.”

And old, desperate

It’s more convenient that I kick the bucket.

First I thought of writing that, Non mi convien cosi crepar,

But then, as I am learning Italian, I checked in the dictionary and crepare also means: to splitting one’s sides laughing. You only need to add “dalle rise”.

Therefore, I will crepar dalle rise, and continue to laugh into any age, genes, fate and my own efforts, take me.

Happy growing old and up!

* I wish the quote was mine. I translated it from Spanish, and I guess it comes from my cheerful 82-year-old brother-in-law, Luis Carlos, who spends a lot of his time sourcing interesting, wise and funny quotes and stories from the Internet.

** For the old or young, but curious, go to my Music Matters… to Me, for some links to Berta’s aria, none sung by me as in those days in Colombia (1983 and 1984), live performances weren’t recorded. You will also find a trip to memory lane from my days with the Colombian National Opera Company.

17. Destiny or Choice?

How to Grow Old the Right Way Up

Saturday 3rd May 2014

 

17. Destiny or Choice?

Will I be happy?

Will I be rich?

Will I find love?

Those questions and many more complex ones have pressed the human mind since the dawn of time.

Our ancestors looked at the stars, convinced that if those twinkling eyes could guide them through the perils of a sea voyage, they must also hold answers to guide them through the hazards of life.

They created all manner of divination systems and tried to read the signs of anything and everything that fell into their hands.

But hang on! Hands! Soon enough, they realized that hands had those very peculiar lines, which resembled a map: a personal one, to explore and perhaps to explain the mystery of their lives.

My precocious wonderings started when I was about eight years old, together with an early awareness of the fact that every day there were choices to be made, which could lead to different consequences. I could choose to eat my sister’s boyfriend’s Valentine’s gift, a chocolate dog that sat day by day sad and forlorn on her shelf with “eat me!” written all over his face. But the consequences might be very costly! More so since my sister was 15 years older than me, and enormous in my view!

I opted for the middle way choice, and nibbled it slowly and consistently, starting with the tail. My sister only discovered my mischief when the only bits left were the front paws and the head. With my clever choice I delayed the punishment for a couple of months, and it was gentler than if I had eaten the whole thing in one go. She couldn’t help finding my cunning very amusing!

Soon I discovered the map written on the palm of my hand, so curiously different from the ones on the hands of my brothers and sisters.

By the age of 10, aided by my own instinct and the one book on the subject I found in my limited home library, I became a School Celebrity as I undertook enthusiastically the reading of palms, surrounded by a circle of curious, huge 16 to 18 year olds.

Soon enough also, I was worrying, literally to death! about the fact that my lifeline was noticeably shorter than most people’s. This discovery only came to confirm existing fears as I had been born and grown up against all odds, with a murmur in the heart, a weak liver and a very fragile constitution.

I wondered if having been born and having survived was my fate and if it was all written in immutable characters all over my hands or….if I had any choice.

I worked out, aided mostly by the Greek system that my life would end at around the time when I would reach 41. My increasing poor health seemed to confirm this possibility.

Part of me accepted this happily. I dreaded old age with all its health hazards of which I had already experienced more than my fair share. I also hated the idea of becoming even uglier than I already thought I was.

But then, one day, I reached 36. I was by then the mother of two young children, and I was convinced I had only 5 years to live!

I went into a huge depression. Then, helped by homeopathy and weekly visits to a psychiatrist, but perhaps more than anything by my resilience and my unorthodox faith, I pulled out and I decided I wanted to live. And I wanted to live a full life, free of fear.

From that moment on, my life became a whirlwind of events, some happy some very unhappy. By the time I reached 41, I had experienced a several forms of death, represented by the horrors of two years of sever depression, and the death of my marriage to a man I loved very much, but also by the death of my old self. Instead I experienced the birth of my wonderful youngest son, together with my own birth as a new, stronger, happier person.

I had to face life alone in a foreign country, with four children, no family or relatives, no money or support. Yet, I’ve never fallen into depression again.

Curiously enough, the life and love lines in the palms of my hand developed extra branches as I found a fulfilling way of living and a wonderful love relationship….

 

To summarize, in my view, hands, and other forms of divination, probably contain some sort of map which shows our genetic heritage and the particular circumstances that surrounded our birth. But as with all maps, it also contains thousands of possible turns and routes, which are entirely our choice to take.

Till next time, trusting you will make the best choice for your life today and every single day of your life.

Patrissia Cuberos

 

IMPORTANT DISCLAIMERS

1. I am not a health practitioner of any description. The tips I will be giving are directly related to my personal experience and my experiences with family and friends who seem to have benefited from those tips. Please if in doubt, always consult a qualified practitioner.
2. With their permission I will be mentioning in these pages the names and expertise of many people who have contributed to my current state of health. See also the Links page. Whenever possible  and relevant, I will be leading you to their websites or giving you a direct contact if you ask me. Nobody is or will be paying me or rewarding me in any way for doing so. I will be doing it because they are wonderful practitioners, to whom I owe much and to whom I am very happy to direct people to, for the benefit of all. I don’t and won’t recommend anyone whose help and expertise I haven’t experienced and benefited from directly.

Fate, Fortune and Will

 

How to Grow Old the Right Way Up

Saturday 15th Feb 2014

Fate, Fortune and Will

Some people are fortunate enough to appear to have it all: health, a roof over their heads, enough food, warmth, clothing, love and security, opportunities for learning, work, creating, enjoying life. However, all too often, they are unfortunate enough not to recognize it.

If you are reading this, it means you, like me, have been spared from the distressing and even tragic consequences of the latest storms. Perhaps, like me, you are reflecting on your good fortune.

After having planned this week’s post, one of my dearest friends asked me, pretty much what the protagonist of one of my books always asks himself:

“Is our destiny determined by genes, birth, upbringing, past choices?

Or can we determine the course of our existence?”*

My answers, based on my personal experience and my observations of life and people, are:

  • 50%, Genes, birth, family, education and upbringing:
  • 50%, What we decide to make of our 50% lottery.

In my personal experience, we can change even our health, and overcome many other seemingly impossible challenges, quite dramatically. We can change, of course, the effects of education and upbringing. We can transform ourselves, our lives, our health and our level of happiness.

In my view, it is the power of our will what can take us all the way, from simple wish to the intention; from the intention, to the attention and focus necessary to work our wish into the desired result. Perhaps you will care to have a look at my nephew Juan Acosta’s project,  http://ThoughtsintoResults.com (By the way, Juan has grown up in USA, and I have had no influence whatsoever in his upbringing. However, obviously we are into similar missions!)

But, how do you train your will to will what you need to will in order to transform your life?

My suggestion for this week is to observe, and if necessary to change your attitude to your life and your circumstances. Essentially, I suggest that you strive to see your glass, not even half full but full to the brim with the unabashed and pretty permanent joy of being alive; of having learnt what you have learnt; of experiencing the love you experience for and from people, places, objects, whatever form love takes in your life.

Will, have Faith in yourself; work at it and/or open space for it. Remember:

“Never give up hope and good luck will find you”

(From the Michael Ende’s The Neverending Story)

IMPORTANT DISCLAIMERS

1. I am not a health practitioner of any description. The tips I will be giving are directly related to my personal experience and my experiences with family and friends who seem to have benefited from those tips. Please if in doubt, always consult a qualified practitioner.
2. With their permission I will be mentioning in these pages the names and expertise of many people who have contributed to my current state of health. Whenever possible and relevant, I will be leading you to their websites or giving you a direct contact if you ask me. Nobody is or will be paying me or rewarding me in any way for doing so. I will be doing it because they are wonderful practitioners, to whom I owe much and to whom I am very happy to direct people to, for the benefit of all. I don’t and won’t recommend anyone whose help and expertise I haven’t experienced and benefited from directly.

*From “The Secret Life of a God”, part of “The Thermodynamics of Love Trilogy”, hopefully to be out and about this year. I won’t give up hope!